First of all, lets get something straight. I’m not married. I want to be married to my dream guy some day, but I’m in no hurry.
I have had many different reactions to who I am and what it is that I do for those I care about, especially in romantic relationships. Now here’s the kicker – I am what is described as a “wifey”.
A wifey, by Internet slang, means:
WIFEY means “Serious girlfriend, wife material” Source: http://www.internetslang.com/WIFEY-meaning-definition.asp
I think it goes a little deeper than that. This definition is looking at what it means to be a wifey from the partner’s perspective.
So what is a “Wifey” then?
I’d like to think that there are some of us women left in the world who do not wish to be power-hungry executives who have black coffee running through their veins and eat men for breakfast. It has taken me a long time to accept it, and after the loss of a few friends who believed differently, I don’t think that all women should adhere to this new stereotype.
The type of woman that I wish to be is the typical 50’s housewife. When I have told people in the past that this is what I would like to model my life after, I have actually been threatened with violence, shouted at, and scolded. I’ve been told on numerous occasions that I have set back the feminist movement by 70 years and that I should keep my desires for a life where I take care of others to myself.
I can remember when I told my old friend, Dianne, this. She actually yelled at me, told my father, and told my current boyfriend, as if I had been doing drugs or had been caught trafficking humans. My oh my, what has this world come to?
How I see being a “Wifey”
A wifey is a woman who likes taking care of others. I love to take care of others in every single way that I can manage. Sometimes, I don’t have the energy to do so, but Oliver is very understanding with my limitations and the fact that I have fibromyalgia. I love to cook for him and make sure that he has everything that he needs and wants. I love to make sure that he comes home to a tidy house when I can manage it, and I go out of my way to make sure that coming home after work is a desirable experience. I make his dinner for when he gets home and I try to make his lunch for the next day at work.
I don’t have all of the tools that I need to be a complete domestic goddess, but I’m working on it. Next up are learning to sew and learning to garden. Funny enough, I can learn both of these things from Oliver’s mother.
I’m just glad that I got the cooking and baking out of the way – being a professional pastry chef has really helped with learning to take care of the darlings in my life.
Of course there’s a catch!
I will go out of my way to do anything and everything for you…if you appreciate it. All that I ask is a thank you, or even a kiss on the cheek to let me know that you appreciate the effort that I went to for you. As soon as my efforts are unappreciated, unlike the regular 50’s housewife, I will stop. Here’s where I’m a little more modern in my thinking and also in the way that I live my life:
If you don’t appreciate me and don’t take me for granted, then I will continue doing what I can to please you. The very second that you take advantage of my nature, I’m out. I refuse.
I have walked out on people in the past and I will not be stepped on. I understand that it’s very tempting to do, and I do realize that I’m pretty much asking for it, but I believe that there is a man out there somewhere who would love to be taken care of in the way that I can and wouldn’t think that it would be too much to say, “Thank you.”